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Is he the one? Is she the one?

Is he the one? Is she the one?

Society teaches you to get married within a certain age, otherwise, you won’t fit in. People might consider there is something wrong with you, isn’t it? Well, it depends on what matters most for you – to “fit in” or to live a joyful life where you feel at peace with yourself…

Having this relationship idea implemented in your subconscious mind becomes your no 1 priority, your life goal. This is exactly why you can’t enjoy and explore relationships, why you hurry and jump into relationships that eventually you discover they’re not a match. You get carried away by the first spark you have with a person wondering every time you meet someone new: 

Is he the one? Is she the one?

You’re looking for guarantees in the other person without even knowing what you actually want. Thinking that compliments received are always enough, thinking that having chemistry is enough to move further on, thinking… that the first person that tells you: “I like you” is The One. All because you have planted this deep belief that you have to get married asap, to… fit in.

Let me tell you something else, not even love is enough to take this decision. 

I said, what I said. And is true. 

Just have a look at the breakup percentage of people in love that got married after the first “I love you”… it doesn’t look good at all.

To be able to decide consciously if you should get married or not, you’ll have to take into consideration other similarities between you two. Like religion, friendships, family perspective, kid’s perspective, relationship concept, career, childhood story, and any other life perspective you might want to know about. 

Again, having a spark, chemistry, or even love for each other is not enough to decide to build a strong long-term relationship.

When you dismiss this marriage belief and focus more on who you want to become, what you want to do with your life, what you’re dreams are… you’ll be able to enjoy relationships at a different level, a more conscious level.

Where you’ll not be asking yourself every time you meet someone if he or she’s the one.

Where you’ll enjoy every moment as it comes without pressure or feeling unwanted.

Where you’ll value yourself and you’re beliefs.

Where you’ll be able to offer more and learn how to receive back as well.

Where you’ll have boundaries in place, but also respect your partner’s boundaries with ease.

Where everything flows, regardless the outcome.

Where you can have an equal give and take on all levels.

Don’t let your life be ruled by this one question – Is he the one? Is she the one? You’ll add unnecessary stress and pressure to your life.

Enjoy the people you accept. Don’t set a timer on them. Will be for one week? One month? One year? A lifetime?

Who knows?

Nothing and nobody can guarantee how long a person will be part of your life. Not even marriage. So, give yourself some break and enjoy moments as they come.

Release this belief that doesn’t bring you joy but pressure. Life has other wonderful things to offer and to focus on, you just need a different perspective. 

Reset your mindset.

Get to know yourself better first, before getting to know someone else.

Use this affirmation and integrate it as an assumption:

I know who I am and what I want, and this is reflected in my life every day in every way!

If you want me to help you in your transformational journey, let’s connect!

 

Have a magical week,

Denisa

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Release fear of rejection

Acting indifferent when you care is the same as pretending you care when you don’t. 

Who or what makes the difference?

People overcomplicate things when it comes to relationships. Short or long terms ones, doesn’t matter. They are afraid to show what they feel, and what they want, creating different scenarios due to overthinking. To eventually discover that it wasn’t at all as they thought after taking action on the situation.

Fear of rejection is a big one and many people experience it, especially when it comes to relationships. Lack of confidence as well. 

From here the overthinking process starts. And continues. And continues… Until you find the courage, the confidence to actually act on what you want. Or, until you miss the chance to actually get an answer – considering afterward how unlucky you are.

People love overcomplicating things… 

My point here? Work on your fears and confidence always. You are not alone in this process. The only difference between people getting what they want and those that aren’t is simply the choice of acting on it, or not. Is having a healthy mindset in place – which covers all aspects of living a better life.

When you want to create conscious relationships you have to act consciously about it. This includes getting comfortable with saying no if needed, but also with receiving a no. There are always new chapters to explore.

This is an affirmation you can use to release fear of rejection:

It’s so easy and natural for me to release fear of rejection!

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I knew it!

I knew it!

How many times did you say it to yourself?

No problem is given without a solution. A problem though is not equal to a solution and not every solution solves a problem.

Ongoing trial and error is a journey until you find the right one. After a few errors, the right solution will just feel right, before you test it. How do you know this? 

You already know how errors feel, so finding the right solution will simply feel… right. 

After you get this feeling the real confirmation comes in.

That is the moment when you say to yourself: “ I knew it!”

This is exactly how you manifest! You build the inner knowing that the solution you want is there, ready to be accessed.

Now, as an evolved human being that you are, you know you can choose what solution works best, based on how it makes you feel.

All you have to do further is to use your imagination. While doing it, capture moments that make you feel good, that bring joy. And loop it. Use imagination with your heart and not ego. 

Make it fun. Make it a new habit.

In a previous post, I asked how would you describe real love. Make a list of what would make you feel good and you’ll have your answer. Whatever feels good is good. For you. 

There is no right or wrong answer.

The sooner you get clear on what you want the faster you’ll get it. This is the best investment you can make, taking the time to understand yourself and what you really want.

Taking the time to master yourself!

E V E R Y problem has a solution. Your job to find it. Your choice to apply it.

Switch the chair while observing to get a different view of the situation you’re contemplating.

 Don’t forget to give yourself some grace while in this process.

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Emotion Is More Powerful Than Thought

Emotion is more powerful than thought. This doesn’t mean that thought can’t influence emotion. It does.

Emotion allows you to empathize with other humans, to create new connections, new friendships, new relationships. Of course, you can decide to connect by thought alone with others, based on personal interest, but we all know this was never the best decision to follow as they are ending fast, plus it doesn’t bring real personal fulfillment.

Emotion is what changes your mindset. You take decisions based on how you feel, and when emotions are not balanced then you may say – it wasn’t a good choice to act on your feelings.

The rule should be simple, if it feels good it is good. If not, it’s not. 

In between those two confusion can interfere.  Where “confusion” is fear, ego, and/or low self-esteem. Which makes it difficult to make the right decision, right?

This is the moment when you learn how to become neutral, to reset. You can get into this state by breathing deeply a few times, to detach from emotions and thoughts.

When in a neutral state you can bring forward the matter you need to decide on. Pay attention to the first impressions you get because that is your answer.

And I just told you how you can access Intuition.

In = inside

Tuition comes from Latin tueri = to guard. Tuition also means care, protection – same thing.

Intuition is your internal protection and guidance. Which I associate with spirit connection, divine connection, or God’s connection – call it as you want.

I don’t intend to teach Latin in this post, but this brings more clarity. Spirit word origin comes also from the Latin spiritus, which means breath.

A simple conclusion from this is that you connect with your inner guidance through breath. And your inner guidance is in your heart.

The heart’s electrical field is about 60 times greater in amplitude than the electrical activity generated by the brain. The electromagnetic energy field of the heart is 5000 times greater than the brain. This means your heart will pick up answers faster than your brain can.

Emotions rule thoughts! Emotions can take over your thoughts faster than thoughts can influence emotions.

When you’re manifesting getting in the feeling of it is what makes it happen.

As N. Goddard says – Feeling is the secret!

 

Talk soon,

Denisa

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Fun Challenge

Let’s do a fun challenge this weekend. I want you to choose one thing that you would love to do this weekend, that you know would bring you joy. This is an exercise I usually apply within a coaching session, so take advantage of it!

 

Where would you be?

What would you do?

Who would you be with?

 

If this is a place you have never been before, Google an image that you like and use it for the next step.

Take a deep breath and Imagine yourself there, get in the feeling of it.

No but’s, no if’s, no how’s.

Just feel yourself there. If you can’t visualize, use your other senses. What would you drink? What would you eat? What’s the sound around you?

Start this exercise tonight and don’t forget to have fun with it.

How do you really want to spend this weekend?

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Build a life you love! Rewire your brain.

The science of our ability to rewire our thoughts and feelings is called Neuroplasticity.

Neuroplasticity is the brain’s ability to change and adapt as a result of experience.

Neuroplasticity = the capacity of neurons and neural networks in the brain to change their connections and behavior in response to new information, sensory stimulation, development, damage, or dysfunction.

Neural pathways are strengthened into habits through the repetition and practice of thinking, feeling, and acting.

This is how you rewire your brain, through repetition. This is how you always learned a new skill since you were a child. Through repetition.

Once you learned something new will go into your subconscious mind, which means you’ll do that specific thing on autopilot – walk, talk, drive, act, think, behave…

Now, ask yourself, what do you want to transform in your life? 

Choose that thought, make it an affirmation and start repeating it.

What behavior do you want to replace? 

What habit?

What situation?

Take a minimum of 10 minutes a day to practice.

Choose mindfully what you want and create a life you love!

If you want to get specific choose one of my coaching options.

Talk soon,

Denisa

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Beliefs drive behavior. Behavior builds beliefs.

“When you change the way you look at things, things you look at change” – Wayne Dyer

Such a simple but powerful quote that summarizes everything you need to be able to change your life.

Changing how you look at things, which is your perspective about a particular situation, is helping you achieve a high-level mindset. A healthy mindset.

For example, if you’re thinking that you always get into relationships where you’re being used, you’ll end up with partners that will do just that.

Beliefs drive behavior. Behavior builds beliefs.

This deeper belief (assumption) that you have is modifying your behavior, conscious or not, which leads to this outcome – getting in relationships where you’re being used.

Or, if you think that everybody you meet is going away from your life sooner or later.

Men or women you meet are all the same, they don’t want meaningful relationships.

Partners you meet stay with you just for your money. Or, true love doesn’t exist.

The list can continue…

The conclusion is that your beliefs about a specific situation form a specific behavior towards people around you. 

When you change your perspective about that specific situation, your behavior will adapt as well. Which leads to your desired outcome.

hat negative belief to be able to change it. Or, you don’t know exactly how to apply it in your favor.

If you are in this situation, I am here to guide you.

It seems simple because it is simple!

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How to stay FOCUSED

Every time you’re thinking of a statement that you believe as true (which is an assumption) you’re manifesting it.

Every time you’re having an inner conversation about something you’re manifesting it.

Imagine what will happen when you’ll start applying the same process but being focused this time…

Focused on what you want.  Focused on the end result of your desire.

How to stay focused on what you want when you’re mind will visit another 1000 thoughts at the same time? (which is normal, especially if you’re just getting started with focused attention)

Here is the answer: Take a deep breath and bring back only the thought you want. That’s it!

Every time you feel you can’t focus, just take a deep breath and start again. The more you practice the easier it gets.

You can even create this new assumption:

I am always focused on what I want!

If you want to get specific let’s connect.

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Money Talk

The real value that brings joy doesn’t come from owning material things. But, material things can help you create real value in your life and long-term joy. Money mindfulness is the key. Understanding that money is a tool to support you on this journey and not to be controlled by it, is going to improve the way you live your life.

It’s a matter of choice on how you actually use it and what your beliefs are around it.

Let’s describe a few scenarios.

1 – What do you think every time you spend money? Do you feel worried, or stressed out? And here doesn’t matter your wealth level, rich people have this scarcity too. Grant Cardone is one example – even though a multimillionaire he was always worried every time he was spending money, check his story, he talks about it in many interviews.

 

2 – Do you have a spending issue? Every time you have an X amount of money you spend it, and often on things you don’t necessarily need. This is called emotional spending. If this is your case, you try to create a moment of joy, short-term joy, by spending it all. This feeling needs to be supplied always, so you created a habit by repeating this action. Another option goes around your belief that money doesn’t bring happiness, so you try to get rid of it as soon as you have it – and you succeed. Most times you’re doing it without being conscious about it. This belief can create other circumstances that will lead to the same outcome – money loss.

3 – On the opposite side, you have generous wealth, but you hold on to it. You don’t spend at all and live your life at the minimum level.

a) You can be rich and live like a poor man, out of scarcity, fear of losing what you own. 

b) I don’t refer here to the category of rich people who choose to live a decent life without showing up as wealthy – these people are balanced and made a conscious decision about the fact that what they own doesn’t equal who they are. B category people are the hidden donors for others in need and humanity projects. A category people keep it for themselves only.

Here is a list of money habits/beliefs to implement.

 

1 – Every time you spend money say “thank you money”. When you buy a bottle of water, shoes, a car, a house etc. say thank you.

2 – To remove money scarcity implement this assumption – Every money I spend comes back to me tenfold.

3 – To increase your income implement this assumption – I am so happy and grateful now that money is coming to me in fast increasing quantities through multiple sources on a continual basis. With ease and for the best interest of all. For me to keep, spend, give, and invest joyously.

Money is here to help you create beautiful experiences which translate into long-term joy. Money must flow, and circulate to allow more to come in. (keep, spend, give, invest)

It’s totally fine to spend on material things you love as long as you don’t create a bad habit by doing it constantly. 

It’s totally fine to be spiritual and wealthy.

You can be happy and wealthy at the same time – one doesn’t dismiss the other.

Money is a tool that you can use and not vice-versa.

Money is here to support you.

Money is… Complete this sentence.

 

Talk soon,

Denisa

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Release Past Experiences

What you ask for many times is right in front of you. You don’t see it always because you’re too busy looking at past mistakes, past experiences.

And this is what most people are doing. Asking, wanting something new while you’re not ready to release the old experiences.

This is also part of personal growth. Not only knowing what you want but getting ready to release what you don’t.

Old experiences are not always a match for the new ones.

Most of your self-work is done when you can release what doesn’t serve you anymore. This part is more important than knowing what you want. Is enough to know what you don’t want, to move forward.

Start identifying yourself with new experiences. Do it in the same way you associate your life with the past ones.

That is your natural way of manifesting.

Implement this assumption to release what you don’t want:

I release all negative experiences into the Universe (God) within. I now fully trust that it’s already done. Thank you for showing me that this issue is already solved!

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Copyright © 2021 Denisa Stancu. All Rights Reserved.
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